Healing Date Night

This Saturday morning cool air breezes in my balcony window and I'm ready for a coffee refill. :) Saturday is Patrick's teaching day at both CONASPEH and Leogane, but this morning he didn't have to to leave until later due to a teaching change up, so we had a big family breakfast of pancakes and eggs. Solomon LOVES pancakes. I love leisurely family breakfasts. It did take me a few painful minutes to fro-pic out the syrup from Sol's curls afterwards, but so worth it. (right Solomon?)

Yesterday was a big day.

We went to Solomon's orphanage in the morning. We were supposed to take Solomon to the child psychiatrist to start his dossier for the adoption. I was pumped because things seemed to have been happening fast as of late: our dossier was translated and approved in the States, it arrived in Haiti and is in the US embassy. But we got news yesterday that we have to put everything on hold until I turn 35 in September since Haiti has a rule that at least one person in the couple has to be 35 years old. We are also supposed to have been married for 10 years, but apparently the marriage thing isn't a big deal if we write a letter about how long we've known each other and been dating. Apparently the age rule is iron clad without wiggle room. I was so annoyed. UURRRR. Now? After all this time? A 10 month road block? We've been talking about adopting another child before we leave Haiti, but really wanted to have Solomon's paperwork close to done. Now we have to consider whether we want to and can afford to work for a second adoption before Sol's paperwork gets done and getting pregnant gets pushed farther back. Big bummer for the day.

There was a new little girl at the orphanage who had just arrived last week. She was 2 years old and I swear she was about the size of a tall 5 month old baby. TINY. Horribly horribly malnourished wearing skin like a little old man. My heart broke in two. I haven't had so much maternal pull come over me since taking Solomon home for the first time. I seriously almost said, "lets take her home and get her healthy." The staff at the orphanage had similar maternal feelings and were extraordinarily careful in picking her up as if they might break her, preparing formula for her, nurturing her. When I held her she held with her whole body: her arms, hands, fingers, legs and even toes clung on. Everything gripped me. This little life that in two years had so much hunger, so much loss and zero growth. We are not supposed to want to fix the lives of people and patients around us, right? But with kids here, I just want to take so many of them home. Especially the little and abandoned ones. Throw an over-active uterus and end-of-reproductive-age hormones into the mix, and the urges almost take over.

So yesterday I was annoyed about the adoption, heart broken about the little girl, wanting to figure out in an afternoon what our plans were for life and family. After a nap I made afternoon coffee while the boys slept and settled into some sitting in the quiet house just thinking, meditating on being here, being present, being witness, being parents.

Last night Patrick and I got dressed up and we had our first date night since Solomon came home. Silvia came over at 5pm and stayed all night. We left and picked up Ben and Alexis who showed us this beautiful restaurant in the "Latin Corner" in Petionville. The food was excellent, the conversation stimulating, the wine hit the spot, and the dinner music was JAZZ. I seriously felt like I had left Haiti in a luxurious moment. It was the first restaurant we've gone to that didn't have house music blaring, black lights and otherwise darkness creating the "atmosphere." We sat in the outdoor dinning area under thatched umbrellas, twinkling lights and pretty silver stars hanging and swinging in the warm night breeze creating a beautiful ambience. A musician played quiet jazz on a saxophone at the bar. It was perfect.

On our way home, Patrick and I had a last minute inspiration to keep the night out going a bit, and we ducked into a little bar on the way home to share a couple of night caps at another spot we looked up in our Lonely Planet book that came highly recommended as a place for atmosphere and live music. When we arrived to the bar--decorated with newsprint as new as Michael Jackson's passing, red-painted ceilings, warm cozy-pub like atmosphere--they were playing JAZZ again, and Christmas jazz. I about cried. We sipped on drinks and listened to the live music that got a little more lively with a Latin feel as the night deepened. Lots of people started dancing and we watched while indulging in the kind of conversation that can only happen outside of the walls of home and routine, nurtured in an atmosphere of relaxation and fun. By the end of the night, we were dancing and reminiscing about the night our feelings were first discovered on a dance floor a block away from our volunteer house in Washington D.C.

Dream date. I smiled all the way home.

When we got back (at midnight) Sol was still up and Silvia looked EXHAUSTED. So we grabbed him, and literally seconds after I had him in my arms, Solomon slept. It was as if he was waiting for his safety net to come home before throwing in the towel. Talk about a heart breaker. I love that little boy.

After everyone the house slept in this morning, shared a big nurturing breakfast, I am happy to reflect and celebrate a night that was the most fun I've had alone with Patrick for a while. I couldn't have asked for anything more perfect under the Christmas tree. Its good to still find yourself absolutely in love with the man you married. Makes all the bumps along the road easier to bear and the celebratory times in life all the more fun.